clockwork is on the war path
Al fayed is innocent , please can you not abduct Dev for mating duties
this blog is copyright of LIZARIKK , throw , clockwork , cloud
harpie , bisto , chops , identity thief , bobble are not welcome
My book is called The Love Bombers by Lacey Ember
see below please , hunnie is not welcome to it , she wants to feed the book into AI
I opt out of it being useto train AI
Lizzys
mothers grandmother was a medium. when the grandmother was a little
girl she had to sit through the seances , saw teacups rattle and would
hide under the table . There was also a streak of maternal abuse
her
Dads grandfather was a coal miner in Northumberland who jumped down a mine in a protest . His widow kept things going for her two sons and Lizzy
went on to take her maiden name . Which actually Mike had suggested
something simlar . It made her feel grounded
Grandpa
moved to London with his wife and made good as a French professor and
news reader . Apparenlty his line came from poor German jews escaping
the war , fiddler on the roof types
Bud
tried to hold a seance when he was a teenager and Lizzy walked out of
it into the garden , she didnt like the atmosphere . Someone turned up to
the party dressed as a mummy which really scared everyone , there were
people screaming in there and their mentally ill mother cooking herself a bowl of rice like as if she were in a ' developing country '
Lizzys
mother always felt that her father was not her real father and that
grandmother had an affair with a fighter pilot during the war . This kind of
rings true for Lizzy as she , mum and Bud seem to have strong celtic
traits that are not present in their other relatives
Spirituality
only really began for Lizzy aged 21 , just before meeting Mike ,
exploring Zen and then what Mike was promoting ' Sahaja Yoga ' which is a
branch of Hinduism that also embraces Jesus . Its a beautiful
combination , that recognises different ' deities ' watching over the
different chakras in the body , like Mahavira who was a guru who
respected all life and would strive not to even tread on an insect
she
had a few spiritual experiences in the squat exploring ' thoughtless
awareness ' and a more powerful one at Mikes a full kundalini awakening .
Shes had many peak experiences since then but never again the full
kundalini . Shri Mataji says that kundalini can be damaged . so either that or
shes not been able to achieve the level of peace and stillness needed
for it to raise . Maybe its damaged if you hear alot of screaming
she
was ' born again ' but with no real guidance as to how to use that ,
she went from one dark time to another doing whatever she felt like ,
confident that Jesus would get her out of whatever disaster or scrapes she had next got herself into . She would use her spirituality in sometimes dark and destructive ways just to feel alot of adrenalin
so
the self destruction went on until she was about 35 and found herself
single after a series of disastrous relationships with self harmers .
She went to a 12 step programm for relatives of alcoholics , found some
solid ground and there realised she had a responsiblity to take better
care of herself . A principle tenet being to ask for Higher Power's will
not your own. which seems at odds with religions ' ask and ye shall
recieve ' . i guess you can ask but be accepting if you dont get what
you asked for
in fact you might get something better , something beyond your
wildest dreams . She never would have imagined she had the courage to
go paragliding . Takes faith to do things like that . And a brilliant
instructor that makes it sound like a walk in the park
it was a long day waiting for other pilots to do their flights , Lizzy had taken some articles to read about drug dealers which the instructors thought was funny
im a bit nervous about flying off a cliff she says
oh youll love a bit of cliff flying ! said the instructor
as though we were going on a merry go round
and so it turned out to be , just like a merry go round
Lizzy took an awesome film from the air looking down at the cliffs with her and the instructor whooping in the background . Lizzy weighed about 12 stone , which is quite a good weight for her
she
came off her meds for a few years and was quite stable , although she
always felt there was something wrong , she progressively became
isolated and her behaviour more warped . This trend was excacerbated by the march of technology when Lizzy found she couldnt afford to phone mobile phones from her landline at 18 p a minute , and at the same time couldnt afford a mobile phone bill on top of her landline . And so isolation set in with attendant madness , and seeing people were reaching out to her online , she got lost somewhere between the real and the unreal , she started to think she was famous , and to do bizarre things like wandering the streets screaming and taking her clothes off in public
221224
No comments:
Post a Comment