clockwork is on the war path
Al fayed is innocent , please can you not abduct Dev for mating duties
this blog is copyright of LIZARIKK , throw , clockwork , cloud
harpie , bisto , chops , identity thief , bobble are not welcome
My book is called The Love Bombers by Lacey Ember
see below please , hunnie is not welcome to it , she wants to feed the book into AI
I opt out of it being use to train AI
this work is entirely fictional
edited 101224
delerious with concussion from one of her fights , she remenisces with painful nostalgia about her former life
she
was born at home in 1964 , her mother was 18 and using nothing but gas.
While Dad was 17 and played the guitar during the birth. There was a
cherry blossom tree outside the window in their Richmond flat . Mum felt weak
afterwards so Dad changed Lizzies nappies for the first two weeks. Maybe
explains why shes quite trusting of men . she was yellow with a pointed head
and someone left a bottle of wine outside the door with no note
her
earliest memory was her first birthday being carried into a darkened
room where there was a cake lit with candles and the family sat around
underlit , an exciting memory that epecially she remembers her Dads
sister there . And when her brother was born a year later she was trying
to help him get to know the teddy bears , travellling around in an
enormous pram . Dad would continue to play guitar at their bed sides ,
mainly Donovans windy city and hush little baby .
one
romantic memory they were leaving Bognor Regis to go back to London
the four of them piled into the back of the romoval van with the shutter
open so they could see Bognor disappearing in the rain in the 60s
atmosphere . sitting on boxes drinking hot chocolate , to a sound track
of Donovan , the Beatles , JJ Cale , they were hedonisitic
back
in London they had a house in West Hampstead . At Bognor she fell down a flight of
metal steps and her mother caught her just before she hit her head on
the concrete . Another time she ended up upside down in the sea in her
rubber ring . And fell out of a tree, her cousin cried and said ' Lizzy
fall '
echoed years later when she became unwell mentally and our italian friends said ' Lizzy est caduta '
Pa
made up his own invented stories for them and so did Mum . Very
creative parents who would get upset if they were not enjoying their
holiday ! one time in scotland Lizzy and Bud were playing with their
soft toys and Pa said ' you could do that in a box in Neasden ' !
they
were expected to go out so they went fly fishing. When Pa and his
partner had gone out in the car. it was raining and the burns were
swollen but they caught some trout . When they arrrived back they found
Lizzy and Bud were not there and were really scared ! Went looking for
them by which time they were back at the house holding their catches up
at the window
in
those days kids roamed free in the woods and on the streets , theyd
walk through the woods to the lido with no adult and sneak in through a
hole in the fence
when she was 5 they got divorced and Mum moved to the suburbs where she was sexually abused by both grand parents
when
Lizzy was 5 she had a kind of a ' sensual relationship ' with another 5
year old. In which they did pretty much everything short of actually
having sex . Lizzy had not been exposed to any adult material at that
age , but maybe the boy was. he invited another girl to join them but
she walked off . The boys mother came in and was a bit disturbed by what
she saw and said we're going out to the park now . i guess the
permissive 60s affected even the children , there were other children at
nursery school that wanted to do intimate things like that in West
Hampstead in the late 1960s playing ' doctors and nurses ' , spanking
games etc. Lizzy didnt think of it as anything particulary unsual and no
adults or older children were involved
Lizzy
as a child was spooked by ghosts and visions. Screaming for help
thinking the bed was covered in spiders , a cupboard door blown open by
the wind, in an old house in northumberland . Because there were two
stair cases in that old house with crumbling wall paper and a smell of
moth balls . it was freezing even in the summer . and youd get up early
sweep the grate and make a fire before other people were awake
She
felt that the adults where ' not really there ' , that nobody was
really there in fact . there was alot of drinking going on every day
mum
kept up a valliant effort until Lizzy and Bud were teenagers they
even cooked and made cakes and jams together like a proper family they
were , even with her as a single parent and she managed to be there for
us , encouraging Lizzy and Bud with their school work and music
practice , organising occasions for the extended family , taking us on
holidays , she was just like a normal mum. Except shed had to put all
that on because actually she was an abused child . Apparently being a
mother to small children was something she was gifted a
when their
teenage nonchalant behaviour broke her spirit and brought out her schizophrenic
behaviour , pots and pans would go flying mother
stood on a chair waving Lizzys music stand in the air saying ' i am
your mother ' . they couldnt make any sense of it and Lizzy assumed it
was her fault . she was already over responsible and these rages just
confirmed that she was . in fact Lizzy was taking responsiblity for
other people since the day she was born , rarely crying even when she
fell out of her cot
she would level accusations particularly at Lizzy who she
felt was too concerned with her studies and not paying enough attention
to her . She made 18 suicide attempts before she succeeded . she wanted a normal life as a teen and moved in with her father and his partner where things were more stable .Lizzy was
at Dads house so Bud was on his own with mum when she died. Of an overdose aided by a bottle of alcohol . She made to
shush him to stop him calling the ambulance so one can only imagine the
grief and trauma that he has gone through
as
a young child she was spooked by ghosts and visions , screaming that
the bed was covered in spiders , she felt like she was rotting or that a
ghost was moving the doors . the adults felt somewhat unavailable as if
there was ' nobody there ' and in retrospect those adults were more
available than Lizzy felt they were
she felt she was always alone always up against a monster
Lizzy
in her teens had crushes on Adam Ant and Mick Jagger both of whom she
had seen live . Along with Freddie Mercury at Wembly . Lizzy lacked
confidence because of her mothers illness and would feel thwarted in
getting the boy she wanted . So had a habit of dating the friend of the
boy she really wanted . There was an A Level study course at Oxford and a
boy there that looked like Mick Jagger , who Lizzy managed to get off with
in fact she tried and failed to lose her virginity with him . she was tense and inexperienced and Mick asked
her to ' put some effort into it ' ! which she took to heart and made a point of with her next sexual encounter . He had to go back to Devon where he
had a girlfriend but turned up in London a few years later and was
again interested in Lizzy who had anorexia by then and was in a
relatiohship with Jez
Lizzys
parents considered themselves ' beatniks ' , 1960s hippies , they loved
to camp and travel around . she was concieved in a tent on mount
Snowdon apparently while they were unmarried. Mums parents said they
must marry to they did , before Lizzy was born . By all accounts they
had a great sex life until things went wrong after having the children.
The furniture was always second hand or part of the rental . Dad was a
hack journalist in his own words and went on to make tv programms and
publish books . She grew up around alot of intellectual conversation ,
the philosophy of ' the aburd ' and was in her teens an atheist with a
strong work ethic and much more mature than her years . A work ethic and
not much of any other kind of ethic . A counterfeit maturity
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